Any hopes we had of a TOWIE and Geordie Shore crossover show (The Only Way Is Geordie, anyone?) have well and truly been crushed, as Newcastle's very own Gary Beadle has slammed the ITVBe reality show as 'fake' and 'as scripted as Coronation Street'.
How does he know? He's actually seen some of it being filmed in Marbella a few years ago and reckons it's not quite as fun as it looks on TV. OH, GAZ, DON'T RUIN THE ILLUSION FOR US.
Having a little chinwag with the Daily Star, Gaz said: "TOWIE is like f***ing Coronation Street. People virtually write storylines for the cast.
"It can go on forever because they'll just bring new idiots in and then people will write them a story and they can crack on, turn up and do their little script. There are probably marks on the floor where they have to stand."
Recalling the Marbella sitch, he continued: "I was in my room at 9am and Gemma Collins was filming a pool party. She was screeching. I was like 'what are you doing? Shut up'.
"She was pretending to be at a pool party. It was just fake. I was so angry when I watched it on the TV and they must have done a montage because she was saying how amazing it was and I was thinking 'that didn't happen – it was f***ing empty'."
Obviously, Gaz reckons his own show is much better because it's 'more real', explaining: "We do what every average kid does. You go out, you kiss someone, you might sleep with someone you regret. The average person doesn't go strutting around Essex.
"We couldn't be like TOWIE. We wouldn't be able to remember our scripts."
Dismissing Gaz's claims, a spokesperson for TOWIE told The Mirror: "As the show disclaimer states, TOWIE follows the real lives of its cast and while certain situations might be constructed, all of the interactions, reactions and emotions are completely genuine."
So, there you go. Thoughts to the usual places, please and big thanks.
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