If you're one of those people who can literally rob a bank and and still find a way to justify your actions to both yourself and the world, count yourself lucky - because you'll never have to deal with the pure torture of living with a guilt complex.
From your worryingly accurate fears that you'll confess to a crime you didn't commit to actually apologising to inanimate objects, here are ten things you'll understand if you blame yourself for everything.
1. Literally everything is your fault
A good, all-encompassing start.
2. You aren't comfortable with making decisions that affect other people
What if they don't like that film choice? What if you end up completely wasting two hours of their life? A WHOLE 120 MINUTES.
3. Negotiations are a nightmare, and you can't be trusted to enter them
You're a terrible human being and you're clearly being unreasonable here.
4. You have apologised to a table/door/cupboard before
It's just your thing at this point.
5. You can't eat dinner unless you've fed your pets first
THEIR FACES, THOUGH.
6. You refuse to give advice to anyone
Because you'll probably end up ruining their life and you know that knowledge would destroy you.
7. You constantly got in trouble as a child for things you didn't do
Well, you're in a few of the same classes as the culprit, so it's kinda your fault too.
8. You live in terror of hurting peoples feelings
It's quite literally the worst thing in the world, and you'd take any form of torture over it.
9. You can easily be manipulated into going to that event that you really CBA with
And don't your friends know it.
10. And finally, you're the most likely person to confess to a crime you didn't commit
A genuine, terrifying fear.
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