THE STUPID INTERVIEW: Jack Whitehall

It's all marmite on toast and making moves on Harry Styles...

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Jack Whitehall (or Jacques de la Blanchall as he's known in France), is a funny, funny man. In fact he's so funny that he has his very own live stand-up DVD out this week which you should probably go out and buy. Before you do that though read our Stupid Interview with him and imagine his smooth, dulcet tones while you read his answers.

Right then Jack, give us your best insult.

Just say "Your face."

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Eh?

So whatever anyone says to you, just say "Your face" back as an insult.

Cool, it's like we're back in the playground.

Yeah!

If you had to eat another celeb to survive who would it be?

Well I guess, someone that there was enough eat of... Lisa Riley. I love Lisa Riley, she's a great dancer.

What rumour would you most like to spread about yourself?

That I was in Mumford and Sons. I think that's believable.

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Have you ever been caught in an intimate act?

Hmm... (Thinks.) Not recently. (Thinks some more.) No I don't think so.

Would you rather lick a tramp's armpit or nostril?

Urrmmm. Nostril.

Any reason or are you going with your gut instinct?

Well an armpit's hairier, isn't it?

Talk to us about marmite.

Love it. It needs a lot of it on a piece of toast.

Do you have it with butter?

Yup.

Brown or white bread?

Brown.

Is it a regular breakfast for you?

This conversation is making me really hungry.

OK, put yourself in this situation then. You see an old lady crossing the road in the path of a massive lorry; at the same time you see a baby playing with a really sharp knife, who do you save?

Am I in the lorry?

No you're a bystander.

I think the old lady. I think the baby might be fine with the knife. Or maybe the old lady as she might die soon as she can't afford her heating bill at Christmas.

Topical.

Yeah.

Who would be better in bed, Rihanna or Nicki Minaj?

Hmmm. Rihanna. She's just dirty.

What would you do if Harry Styles was cracking onto your sister?

Crack onto him.

That would be a good way to block him from the sis.

Yeah.

Well that's that then, cheers Jackie boy.

If you want to go out and buy Jack's DVD, it looks like this:

And you can find it at places like here.

What do you think?

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