Ladies and gentlemen, please WELCOME TO THE STAGE: The 1975's Matty Healy, and his fragile masculinity.
What are we on about? Well it turns out poor Matty can't quite deal with strong, independent women - because he reckons dating the infinitely more successful Taylor Swift would have been 'emasculating'.
Speaking to Q magazine about that time he was linked to Taylor, Matty did some serious mansplaining, essentially comparing dating someone with her level of global fame to having his dick cut off.
"So the one time I did have a flirtation with a girl it ends up going everywhere," he began.
"I mean, I got on E! News and people were like, 'Who's Matt Healy?' so that was cool. But I didn't make a big deal out of it myself.
"It's not really anything to talk about, because if she wasn't Taylor Swift we wouldn't be talking about her.
"She wasn't a big impact on my life. It's just interesting to me how interested the world is about Taylor Swift."
Then asked if he has a fear of losing himself when he enters into a relationship, Matty replied: "Yeah. Absolutely. And the reason I mention that is because if I had gone out with Taylor Swift I would've been, 'Fucking hell! I am NOT being Taylor Swift's boyfriend'.
"You know, 'FUCK. THAT.' That's also a man thing, a de-masculinating, emasculating thing."
Poor little thing. It must be hard to have such a delicate sense of self-worth that relies so heavily on outdated gender norms. Perhaps we should all tweet him telling him how big and manly and famous he's looking these days.
What do you make of all this? Eye-rolling so hard your eyeballs feel like they might fall out? Yeah, us too.