Which they would have to be going out for her to do. Which they're not. Weird.
Harry Styles, Harry Styles' mum Anne Cox, and most of the rest of the world have said that Harry is definitely not in any way dating model Emma Ostilly. Yet an apparent 'friend' (not for much longer we'd say...) of Emma's has come forward to a magazine claiming that they're together, and she'll dump him the minute he's rumoured to be with someone else.
We've got a story too; "Liam Payne is actually a 65 year old with Benjamin Button syndrome, that's why he's so sensible." But we'll be poite and hear out this gossip-monger first.
"Emma has a few trust issues because she knows Harry has women throwing themselves at his feet and she finds that hard," heard New! magazine.
"She's warned him not to make a fool of her and basically told him, 'Stray and you're dumped.'
"She has made it very clear that if he is so much as linked to another girl, they're over."
What, if Harry is so much as linked to another girl?
Every five seconds, Harry Styles is linked to another girl. By the time you've finished reading this article, seven more girls witll be rumoured to be dating him.
THIS SOUNDS LIKE A LOAD O' TOSH. #journalism
Harry Styles' friend victim of internet trolling
Images: Wenn / PA