A literal load of crap
There have been some fairly strange rumours about Harry Styles in the past, but we're guessing that when you woke up this morning you weren't expecting to hear that he's supposedly been rubbing bird poo into his face as part of his prep for One Direction's Where We Are Tour.
As far as we know this isn't just some bizarre new hobby of his and actually, according to the latest poo-based reports, Harold has been getting Geisha facials, that involve having Nightingale poo smeared all over your chops to make your skin soft, silky and totally spot-free.
We always thought that the people who say birds pooing on your head is lucky had clearly never had a seagull crap on their hair as they're running for the bus. But apparently over in Japan people are so keen on bird poo that they actually rub it into their faces to make them as softer than a baby's bum.
Being a man of the world, Harold has apparently, allegedly and supposedly decided that this is just the thing to get him ready for tour and according to some fairly hilarious rumours, has added rubbing a load of poo on his face into his daily skincare regime.
"Harry’s been having a bird poo facial every day in the run-up to the tour," a band insider apparently told the Daily Star. “He doesn’t want to be as spotty as he has been in the past.
“He’s really struggled with his skin over the years," the source, who we're really starting to suspect might be Kevin the Pigeon, added.
“So far he’s happy with the results."
"It’s given him a really glowing look," the source added, nodding like the wise man of the forest.
Frankly this all sounds a bit unlikely to us and as lovely as Harry's face does look, we slightly doubt it's all thanks to a face full of shit. Either way, we're quite impressed we managed that without a single inappropriate joke about Harold loving a facial.
Oh poo, at least we tried.
What do you reckon - think Harry would rub poo on his perfect face or think it's a gigantic pile of, erm, crap?